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apology posts

Filed under: Fun, Time-Wasters, Humor

Kanye West apology generator - Time Waster

To appreciate the Kanye West apology generator, you may need some background: by now you've probably heard about rapper Kanye West's outburst at the Video Music Awards, interrupting teenage country star Taylor Swift as she accepted an award. Even if you don't have a TV, I'll bet you've noticed that "interrupting Kanye" has gone viral, and it's almost unavoidable on the web. While Kanye's stunt is kind of played out as a joke already, his blogged (but quickly deleted) apology to Taylor Swift is a more fertile comedy goldmine.

Kanye's propensity for blogging in all caps is already mildly hilarious, but when you combine that with a heat-of-the-moment defense of his actions -- written and posted while he was still at the awards that night -- you've got something really special. All you need to do is fill in the required fields, Mad Libs style. No description I could write would do justice to Kanye's original post, so I'll just present this apology I generated for some of Download Squad's lead bloggers:
I'M SOOOOO SORRY TO GRANT ROBERTSON AND VICTOR AGREDA, JR. FOR WRITING THE POST. I SPOKE TO VICTOR AGREDA, JR. RIGHT AFTER. GRANT ROBERTSON IS VERY UPSET !!........... I'M IN THE WRONG FOR POSTING AND DELETING!!!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!!! I'M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT DOWNLOAD SQUAD. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO GRANT ROBERTSON 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I'M A FAN OF BLOG!!! Y'ALL KNOW!!! BOOOOYAAAWWWWW!!!!!!! AIGHT I GAVE MY APP TO MIKE ARRINGTON WHEN THEY DESERVED IT... THAT'S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!!!!! I'M NOT CRAZY YALL, I'M JUST BEING REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!!MUCH RESPECT!!!!!
It probably won't be as funny next week, when this whole thing is ancient history, so strike while the iron is hot. Post your own Kanye Apology in the comments.

Filed under: VoIP

Skype apologizes to paying customers with contract extensions

Skype Apology
Like any corporation recovering from a major service interruption, Skype is doing everything in its power to make sure customers don't jump ship and start using competing VoIP services. For two days last week, millions of Skype users were unable to connect. For some folks, this just meant you had to switch to a different chat program or pick up the cellphone to call your friends long distance. For some small businesses who had already cut their land line, this was the equivalent of the phones going down after a hurricane.

Today, Skype sent out an e-mail to customers who have signed up for services like Skype Pro, Skype Unlimited, SkypeIn or Skype Voicemail. In a nutshells, since these customers are paying on a subscription basis, the closest Skype can give to a cash incentive is a contract extension. So the company is giving all its paying customers an extra 7 days on their contract.

On the one hand, 7 days free for a 2 day outage seems like a good deal. But reliability? Priceless.

It's not clear whether Skype is offering any cash apologies to customers who sign up for SkypeOut credit but don't have a long term calling plan. You can read the entire e-mail after the jump.

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With Halloween fast approaching, it's a great time to get in some practice defending your territory against zombies. In Graveyard Shift, you take aim at zombies and other creepy-crawlies, blasting them into splatters of cartoony green guts. It's a casual first-person shooter, and it's very easy to get the hang of - use the mouse to aim, click to fire. Graveyard Shift has at least 15 levels, and it might even have some secret stages I haven't unlocked yet. They key to getting good at Graveyard Shift is learning to use ...

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