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What Conficker headlines do you want to read tomorrow?

Sophos Labs' Graham Clulely authored a blog post today asking users for the best Conficker headline they've read. Pretty much all the major antivirus providers have announced that 1) most users are safe because the required Windows patch has been available since October via Windows Update and 2) there's a good chance nothing at all will happen tomorrow.

Since it's April 1st, though, let's have a little fun with this one. Here are a few I'd like to see. Submit yours in the comments!

Conficker turns into the world's biggest RickRoll

Hey, it goes off on April 1, so why couldn't it be a colossal prank? The original is kind of tired, though, so maybe Conficker might opt for something more like Interior Crocodile Alligator - which isn't at all horrible, so you should definitely click the link.

Conficker wipes out Incredimail installs

Sure, this might be considered bad because it's removing something a user chose to install on their system, but come on - Incredimail is an awful piece of software, and no technician in his or her right mind would be sad if a customer phoned saying "I got a virus and now that butler guy that brings me my emails is gone!"

Conficker kicks in, forces torrenters to seed after 100%

Maybe the author has some altruistic motives. Maybe he's tired of waiting three days for a seed to come back online so he can finish a torrent because other users keep dropping out as soon as they hit 100%. You're only getting that file because other people are sharing it, so do you part and chip in!

Microsoft admits releasing Conficker to ferret out unlicensed XP installs

If Windows Update has had the patch for months, then who might be the largest group of people that haven't applied it yet? Why, people who are running non-genuine copies of Windows XP, of course! There's no telling what lengths Microsoft might go to in order to get you to buy a real license. Hey, anything is possible. Grab your tin foil hat!

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