AOL acquires new properties

Filed under: Fun

AOL acquires new properties

by Lisa Hoover Apr 1st 2008

This may not be an African Grey. It's April Fools Day, get over it.

Download Squad's parent company AOL announced the acquisition of several small companies this week:

Originally intending to sue for copyright infringement, AOL decided to instead purchase the rights to AIM for Lindsay Lohan, a forked AOL instant messenger app designed by fans of the popular but troubled star. ALL was conceived by three Michigan teens who say they cobbled the program together in an effort to raise money to "help Lindsay buy a day at the spa so she can, you know, relax."

AOL also purchased Yore Aviary, an online genealogy service for African Grey Parrot owners hoping to trace their bird's ancestry. Though there are currently only 16 registered members, they make regular treks to the jungles of Africa in an ongoing effort to footprint each bird for posterity. The group made news recently when a fistfight erupted between members arguing over what type of crackers to serve at its monthly meetings.

AOL also acquired Silicon Valley startup Basar Technologies, which specializes in direct mail via USB key. According to an AOL spokesperson, future plans for Basar include bi-weekly mailings of thumb drives preloaded with AOL 9.0 to every household in America. Additional free distribution of the keys are planned via 11 other channels, including free with gasoline purchase and attached to the neck of every 20 oz. Coke product.

AOL president Ron Grant could not be reached for comment, however his office issued a brief statement saying, "ALL Yore Basar belong to us."

Tags: afd08

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

Sirrah said 12:16PM on 4-01-2008

Groan......

Alex M said 12:40PM on 4-01-2008

Heh, heh, heh.

sc said 12:40PM on 4-01-2008

I bought into your bull for a paragraph or two, then I remembered the date.

invadesoda said 2:35PM on 4-01-2008

Download Squad's parent company AOL

Don't scare me like that, dude!

Brad Linder said 2:47PM on 4-01-2008

Umm... that part's not a joke. Notice the links on the side and bottom of this page.

invadesoda said 9:59PM on 4-01-2008

Oh! That's a bit shocking. Well, then, it's the best thing AOL has going then. Did it start off as AOL, or was it acquired?

Brad Linder said 10:24AM on 4-05-2008

AOL bought our parent company Weblogs Inc a few years back. That means they now own Engadget, Autoblog, Download Squad, TUAW, and a bunch of other blogs.

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